Raisins and Grapes

I don't know why, but I just felt this urge to write a post about raisins. They've been good to me these past few weeks, maybe it's just time that I returned the favour. Did you know that raisins are a natural source of fibre? (source: my little green box of ASDA raisins). Also, they should be stored in a cool dry place. They can be hazardous to young children too as they can choke from them! They're also quite bouncy. I dropped one earlier and it took me ages to find it, missed out on the 5 second rule. Then I dropped another (not on purpose) and caught it just in time. Alhamdulillah :). Also, the word 'raisin' in French means grape. Odd, ay? (Well, I think it does... maybe a member of my French fanbase can clarify that for me). I like grapes, too. It's a shame that they're so expensive. I think the Arabic word for grapes is hur. I'm basing that on that whole thing about how some feminists and orientalists re-interpret the verses in the Qur'an about wide-eyed maidens in Jannah (I don't wanna debate about that, it's written in the book of Allah 'azza wa jal, end of) actually talking about white grapes (fools). I might be wrong there though, maybe by Arab readers can verify that one for me. How are my German readers doing? I don't want you guys to feel left out. Here's a little homework for you, how do you say grapes and raisins in Deustch? 3 years of studying the language and I never learnt two of the most important words. Shameful, I know. In fact, my Chinese readers have that same piece of homework. You have 'til Friday.

It's a great feeling being so widely followed (and self-deluded)...

UPDATE:

Oh my God. Oh. My. God. I just had one of those life-changing moments. This is up there with when I read The Autobiography of Malcolm X and my whole life changed. When I first started school. When I took my first step. This is just... out of this world.

So here I am, sitting in my office, and I get a call from one of my avid followers (no idea HOW she got my personal number. She said she works for a security consultancy, that's probably how..) and she told me about how she just read this post. And oh my God. Are you read for it? Are you ready? 'Cos I wasn't..

OK

Here goes..

Raisins ARE grapes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD!

I know right!! Unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable.

Alhamdulillah. I mean, raisins are dried grapes??? Who would have thought it? SubhanAllah, even when that scrumptious grape dries up, it still tastes so good! SubhanAllaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Mann, I still can't register it. Wow....

Although, I guess it does kinda explain the picture on the box. I thought those those raisins looked more like grapes... (it explains why they were green too!).

Work Trousers

Oh my God.

Tonight I came to a realisation that has been staring me in the face for months now. I mean, it was obvious. I knew it all along, but I just kept ignoring it. But now I can ignore it no longer. I need to lose weight. I mean, I stand on the scales everyday. I'm not blind, I can see how much further that little damn arrow goes. But I never really noticed when I looked at myself, so kinda just ignored it. But when it came on to trying on a pair of work trousers I wore a year ago, and just how badly they didn't fit... what a moment. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone. From tomorrow, I'm hitting the treadmill again. Hardcore. I've done it before (6 times a week for a year and a half), so I know I can do it again. Just gotta stay strong.

I hate that damn treadmill though..

You Know You're Fat When...

How does that expression go? 'You know you're fat when you can't fit in your old pair of jeans' or something like that. Well I'd like to propose a new expression. A much more accurate acid test for knowing when you're fat. Ready...

You know you're fat when... your're parents call you fat. :|

That's right, when you're parents call you fat, you KNOW you're fat. And guess what, I'm fat! Well my parents said it, so I've gotta be, right. You know, those same people that raised me, are supposed to love and support me no matter what. That's right, point blanc, no warning, they just put it out there...

OK, so I know I'm not really fat. Maybe I gained a little weight over the past year, but come on... what do you expect? A year at Uni living off of junk food (I didn't live out though... if I did then my parents would DEFINITELY have a point) can be a little unforgiving on the waistline. And it's not like I've been oblivious to the situation... I have a nice pair of jeans that I used to wear all the time that has been gathering dust in my cupboard for about 6 months now. But what can I do... I go on the treadmill, but I just can't cut down on the food. I love food too much, and you know what? Food loves me! It's a beautiful relationship we share (the antithesis of my hate-hate relationship with the treadmill). Food is my friend. A good Muslim never abandons a real friend, so unfortunately mum and dad, you're gonna have to get used to a plumper me for a while. How long is a while? Well, until it's time for me to get married of course ;).

And I'm not hating on my parents, they're only looking out for me. But mannn, how about looking out for my ego from time to time?